Do we sell our dreams short? I think I do. Not wanting to sound like like I am asking for sympathy, but I have been feeling a slight unease since moving in to our new house. I have been so completely blown away by the surrounding nature that I hadn’t felt like I could completely accept it as my new life so that I could settle in.
But I recently managed to put my finger on this feeling. I felt like I was actually having to become comfortable with my beautiful new home because it far exceeded my expectations. I think I had been imagining just an average house in the country not the amazing location we ended up with. In fact even the estate agent under-advertised the house, highlighting the work that needs doing rather than the potential and the incredible surroundings. So while we could see it was a nice area, it was only after moving in that we discovered how beautiful and peaceful it really is.
I don’t think I was quite prepared for the extent of this beauty I see every day. Maybe I didn’t visualize it because I didn’t think we would find such a place within our budget. Maybe I thought that I didn’t deserve such a nice place.
I think the power of visualization is very strong so I am grateful that we didn’t end up with just an average place in an average rural location. This insight has recently lead me to correct my ambitions in other areas of my life. I have, for example, decided to keep an eye out for a new part time job. I thought that I would be able to see my current one out until I can support myself completely with my projects, but it’s becoming increasingly difficult to work there now that the contrast between how I feel in my free time and my work time is so great.
Instead of visualising my dream job I have caught myself visualising what I think is reasonable to find. I would prefer to work locally but I haven’t been able to imagine an authentic and ‘alternative’ place for me to work. But it occurred to me ‘Am I selling myself short?’ If I don’t aim for anything better than ‘it will do’ how can I expect to be content with my future new position?
One certainly has to be careful with what one wishes for. I remember hearing of someone who had wished for years to become a millionaire. Eventually he did – but not in the way he would have hoped. He had been involved in an accident which left him paralyzed and had been awarded $1 million in compensation. So not only must we not sell our dreams short, we must also be slightly more specific to ensure what we receive serves us.
I can confirm this. I have dreamed about a home in the country for so many years. In fact I did buy a house in the country about 5 years ago. It was certainly an amazing experience, and the location was wonderfully peaceful, but I hadn’t visualized the scenario that would best satisfy my needs. I bought the house solo – it was just me and my cats. But I have since discovered it’s so much more enriching to share the experience with someone – it makes a house feel more like a home.
I don’t regret buying that house for a moment. It served as a cocoon for me giving me the time and space to become more authentic. It was incredibly inexpensive to buy and also very cheap to run. The low outgoings gave me the confidence to quit a very uninspiring and almost damaging job and just take time out. Time to heal and time to grow. There were good times in that house, and there were almost freakish movie-type moments, such as when the house was attacked by a swarm of hornets, which I discovered after I saw them squeezing themselves through the wooden shutters in the middle of the night!.
But the house lacked something. It lacked Christoffer. We had only recently become a couple when I bought the house, so it wasn’t even considered that we should live there together. I didn’t know I needed to visualize a house AND someone to share it with! Dur! But now, second time around, my vision for my new home included My Love.
Interestingly, during our search for a home I discovered that we also need to really tune in to our partner when aiming for something together. Towards the end of our search for a home, I got quite specific about what I wanted. Suddenly we saw a place that had the precise details of what I have envisioned. It was almost creepy how tailor made this house was for my wishes. I say my as we were of course two and since Christoffer hadn’t really imagined the house to the detail like I had he didn’t click with it on the level I did. In the end we were out-bid, and bought the beautiful home we have now, but it just blew me away how the universe can deliver what we ask for. Down to the tiny details.
So with this in mind I urge you to not under-visualize your life. You deserve to be blown away with beauty and fulfillment! You deserve a life to love.
-Thanks to Christoffer for the beautiful photo of our neighbourhood!
You can see more of his photography here: http://www.flickr.com/photos/10211031@N03/